Frame Flipping?

I don't even know what "threatens the family" means.
In what way does it threaten and what does family mean?

Victims apologise to abuser? What for? That makes no sense to me.

[To Petra Liverani]

To be clear, this is not a belief I hold, but here is the thinking.

To them, the abuse itself isn't the issue. They find a way to justify it, victim blame, whatever. To them, the issue is that the victim speaking up can potentially cause division in the family, with some supporting the abuser and others supporting the victim. Additionally, it can ruin the abuser's reputation. The victim, in this case, can prevent that from happening by staying quiet. So, if a victim has already spoken up, someone with this mindset might think they owe someone an apology for causing the division or reputation loss.

Thanks Mr W.

I think it would be beneficial to see exactly what is said in Gary Chapman’s When Sorry Isn’t Enough with regard to victim apologising. Can you quote?

'Marcie' is the victim.

 Marcie recalls what she said: “I’ve come to apologize for allowing anger, bitterness, and resentment to keep me away from you for all these years. I know that I was wrong to have done that. I am deeply sorry that we have lost all these years. I don’t know if there is anything I can do to make that up to you, but I’m willing to try. I want the future to be different, and I’ve come to ask you if you will please forgive me.” 

Note how Marcie is cast as a 'wrongdoer' for 'allowing anger, bitterness and resentment' in keeping her away from the family. And the context clearly states the onus is on her to initiate contact with the estranged family.

I was talking to a clinical psychologist about this and she deals with many abuse victims. She says it's common for victims to be pressured to 'forgive' (for the sake of 'family' and 'because Jesus says so' etc) and this often provokes as she said, 'secondary trauma' for obvious reasons. 

Thanks Dr Bo